Religion, Ale, and FOMO: Spring Break in Oxford

By Lily Reslink

Media and Communication major Lily Reslink is an academically rigorous, professionally driven hippie child trying to do good in the world with the power of media and communication. She’s a journalist, student, and environmental communicator. Born in Erie, Pennsylvania, Reslink has trudged and stumbled through 21 years of life to her senior year at Virginia Wesleyan University. As a researcher of overconsumption and individualistic thinking, she sees building stronger communities as the best way forward for planet Earth.

Religion, Ale and FOMO: Spring Break in Oxford

In a hotel I just arrived at but already wished to leave, my chest panged with the familiar fear of missing out (FOMO).

In a new, exciting setting of Oxford, England, every sound from outside spiked paranoia of a grand adventure happening without me. Knowing the emotion was irrational did not make it any less all-consuming. FOMO usually works that way.

It was past midnight. I had just completed a day of international travel. I’d be waking up early the next day. My agenda needn’t exceed showering and bedtime. Instead, I grappled with FOMO, decision paralysis, and desire for something unknown.

C.S. Lewis, an Oxford scholar, used the word “Sehnsucht” to describe an inconsolable longing or yearning for something that is not reachable or even definable. The feeling is a deep, spiritual compass toward God and heaven.

The course that brought our class to Oxford focused on writers who questioned the bounds of religion and academia. If Lewis knew the term “FOMO,” maybe he’d have applied it.

Deep thinking reflects discomfort with uncertainty. Oxford built a culture around three primary venues to look for answers: universities, churches, and pubs.

At universities, uncertainty guides learning. More knowledge leads to more questioning. In academia, dead ends in knowledge are the opportunities to choose from.

At churches, faith satisfies uncertainty. Structured beliefs connect actions to purpose. Faith-based action connects purpose to confidence in one’s end fate.

At pubs, guidelines loosen. People falter less at uncertainty’s mental inhibitions and cling less to certainty’s comfort. Honesty and openness prevail.

With Oxford leaving little distinction between the people at all three venues, windows for convening are left wide open. Thought exchange occurs across settings and contexts with different expectations and mindsets.

People convene to either exchange knowledge on certainties or exchange perspectives on uncertainties. This cycle of learning is a special part of what makes us human.

Why do people get an education? Why do people place faith in religion? Why do people gather around a table together while sipping from a pint? All are different sources of security.

But security should be a comforting home you return to, not a room you never leave.

Unbridled by self-perceptions of imperfection and fears of not knowing, honest thought exchanges often welcome progress. Originality is rooted in openness, meaning that external expectations dampen the ability to find what feels truly right.

I wish no one shied away from sharing their own thoughts behind their universal purpose, not one that is fed to them. 

I still don’t know what I believe about religion. I still think beer tastes bad. I still constantly feel that somewhere out there, something better is happening without me. But I do know that I feel better when I share honest thoughts and receive them in return.

You can’t do everything. You can’t know everything. But you can always make an effort to be truthful.

Perhaps if people dug deeper and got more comfortable with personal truths, we’d have less FOMO and need less ale to be honest.